The devil with the quiz
by DJenero
Summary: Who knows who better? The Sekiryuutei or the two great Onee-sama's? find out in this short fanfic. Based on an episode from the sitcom, F.R.I.E.N.D.S.


**Hey guys, I know everyone said this before and I'm no exception. So please bear with me okay? Great! As you know, this would be my 1** **st** **fanfic, any comments or reviews are welcome and more fanfics to come, so enjoy.**

 _Talking: "…"_

 _Thinking: '…'_

 _Ddraig talking to Issei: ["_ _ **…**_ _"]_

 _Ddraig Thinking to himself: ['….']_

A typical Sunday afternoon, all the members of the Occult Research Club (excluding the two great oni-sama's and Issei) are chilling in the living room at Hyoudou residence. The silence in the room is broken when the club members heard a quarrel coming from outside. As the two great oni-sama's plus Issei arrive home, they continued their argument….

Rias: "So you're telling me Ise, that you know about Akeno and I better than we know you?"

ORC members: "ooooooo…"

Akeno: "Ara ara, are you sure about that Ise-kun?"

Issei: "I know so, how could I not know about both of your likes & dislikes or your personalities after living with you all for almost 9 months?!"

Rias: "Hmph! I doubt it. Care to prove it?"

Issei: "Sure! No problem. Rias, you can't sleep with your clothes on, and Akeno-san, you have an obsession with scary movies and the Twilight Saga."

Rias & Akeno: "YOU KNOW THIS BECAUSE WE TOLD YOU BEFORE!"

Issei hides behind Kiba after being yelled at.

Kiba: "Now calm down buchou & Akeno-san. I'm sure Ise-kun is just joking and there must be a way for you all to decide who know who better.

Issei: "So what do you suggest?"

Rias: "Ah hah! How bout we make a bet. We'll have 2 teams: Ise vs Akeno & I. We'll each answer a series of questions and Ise, if you lose, you'll have to watch the whole Twilight saga with myself and Akeno."

["I think you had pushed your luck too far partner" (sweat drops)]

Akeno: "Ufufu! Killing two birds with one stone. I can't wait to see Ise-kun squirming in despair..."

Issei: "Ok fine! But if you two loose … (evil grin), you two will have to cosplay as Magical girls and receive a photo shoot for Comic fiesta tomorrow."

Rias hesitates, but before she could reply….

Akeno: "Alright Ise-kun, we have a deal! Ufufu! "

Rias: "Akeno! Wh.. why? Why ? why do you have to accept!?"

Rias now anxious because of Akeno's action.

Akeno: "3 main reasons Rias, Ufufu!"

The rest of the club members feel sorry for their master, knowing that their vice-president, is also a sadist….

Akeno: "1) I always wanted Ise-kun to watch Twilight with us.

2) As a sadist, seeing our buchou crying in embarrassment turns me on.

3) I always wanted Ise-kun to see me in a cosplay attire."

Issei: "So what do you say Rias? You could back down if you want. Hehehe"

Issei said to his master in a mocking tone. Unfortunately for Rias, her pride got the better of her.

Rias: "Sigh… Ok Ise, consider our bet accepted. But who will make the questions?"

Asia: "Umm, Kiba-san, Xenovia-san & I can do it. Won't we?"

Kiba & Xenovia: "Sure why not."

(2 hours later…)

Kiba: "Ok, this is how we're going to do it. Asia will be in charge of the scores, Xenovia-san and I will be asking to the three of you 5 questions per team. Whoever gets the most correct answers wins, and Issei is allowed to ask Ddraig for help. HOWEVER, Bilingual is forbidden."

Rias: "WHAT! No fair!"

Akeno: "Ara ara, this is troublesome."

["hahahha, this will be interesting. You ready partner?"]

Issei: 'Yep, too bad I can't use bilingual though.'

Kiba: "Each team gets to pick a question from these 3 categories: Living nightmares, Family matters & it's nothing personal. Now, in my hand is either a pawn piece or a rook piece. Guess the piece and you'll get to start first."

Kiba shows one of his fist holding a chess piece.

Rias: "Rook!"

Issei: "I guess that leaves me with pawn."

Kiba opens his hand and….

Rias: "Aww come on!..."

Issei smirks and awaits kiba's question.

Kiba: "Ok Ise-kun, pick a category."

Issei: "it's nothing personal."

Kiba: "When buchou was a baby, what does lord Gremory and Sirzechs-sama usually do to her?"

Issei: "Take photos of her when she was crawling."

Kiba: "That's correct."

Issei jumps in happiness.

Rais: "Yuuto! How did you know that?!"

Koneko :Pfftt….(trying to hold her laugher)

Kiba: "Errm….. I got my sources. Ok ladies?"

Akeno: "Living nightmare"

Xenovia: "What scares Ise the most?"

Rias: (staring at Issei) "ufufu. The Twilight saga…."

Issei had a sweat drop while feeling a chill down his spine.

Xenovia: "Yep! Correct! And I understand why." (Shivers a bit)

Kiba: "Ise-kun, Your pick?"

Issei: "Family matters."

Kiba: "Akeno-san had a distant cousin from the Himejima Clan, name that cousin."

Issei: "err… ermm…."

Rias: 'tee hee hee, look at him struggle….'

Issei: 'Ddraig, little help here?'

["Slash-dog"]

Issei: 'You sure?'

["You don't trust me partner?"]

Issei: 'Alright fine!' "err… S-slash-dog!"

Kiba: "… looks like Ddraig saved him this time, you're correct!"

Akeno: "Ara ara Ise-kun, I didn't know Ddraig know about my family history."

Xenovia: "Ok buchou, which category?"

Rias: "Same category."

Xenovia: "True or false? Ise-kun learned to play football from his father."

Akeno: "True."

Rias: "No!"

Xenovia: "Sorry fuku-buchou, but Ise's father taught him ice-skating."

Rias: "Akeno, next time leave the family questions to me!"

Kiba: "Ok Ise-kun you're up."

Issei: "Living nightmare."

Kiba: "What is buchou's worst fear?"

Issei looked at Rias and knew what it was from the start.

Issei: (inhales) "sigh…. The thought of losing me."

Rias: (touched with tears in her eyes) "Aww…. Ise…."

Akeno then shocked her master with a bit of lightning.

Akeno: "Ufufu! Rias, we still have a bet to win, unless you want to give in to Ise-kun now."

Rias: (pouting) "I guess you're right, I won't fall for that trick again Ise!"

Rias is currently blushing while the other members are trying to hold their laughter, Koneko on the other hand is already rolling on the floor laughing.

Xenovia: "Pfftt… ok..ok… so buchou what will be your…."

Rias: "You know what? This is taking too long. Yuuto, anything else you have to speed things up?"

Issei: "Hey Rias, that's cheating!"

Kiba: "Actually I do. Then let's start, THE SUPER SPEEDY SPEED ROUND!"

Akeno: "Ufufu! Now it starts to get interesting! Ufufu !"

Xenovia: "Ok here's how this is going to work, answer as many questions possible within 30 seconds. The team with the most questions answered correctly wins. Ise, you're first."

Issei: "Hold on Xenovia…."

Rias: "It's your lost now Ise, prepare to enter the Twilight zone! Ufufu!"

Akeno: "Ara ara Ise-kun, looks like you're all out of luc…."

[Boost !]

Akeno: "What?!"

[Boost!]

Rias: "No! That's cheating!"

[Boost!]

Kiba: "Nope, it's legal. Ddraig is welcome to assist Ise-kun in any way possible. Only Bilingual is banned, remember?"

[Boost!]

Issei: "That's right! I may not have the brains, but I have a heavenly dragon in my hand…."

["Actually around your hand partner…." (sigh)]

Issei: "Well, ya right. Ddraig, transfer power to my mind!"

[Transfer!]

Issei: "Wow! I can think so much faster now!"

Kiba: "Ok Ise-kun. Are you ready?"

Issei: "I'm waiting…"

Kiba: "Alright, your time starts…. (starts stopwatch) Now! Buchou claims she like to watch…"

Issei: "How I Met Your Mother!"

Kiba: "Correct! But her actual favorite show is…"

Issei: "Desperate Housewives!"

Rias starts blushing as the club members stare at her.

Kiba: "Akeno-san used to have a doll named…."

Issei: "Lolita!"

Kiba: "Correct! Which is actually a…."

Issei: "Burned up Barbie doll"

Even Akeno started to squirm in embarrassment.

Kiba: How old was Buchou when she had her first crush?"

Issei: "13?"

Kiba: "No, 9"

Rias: "Too bad Ise. :P"

Kiba: "How many colour of dresses does buchou have in her closet?"

Issei: "White, red, green…"

Kiba: "two seconds!"

Issei: "Uh er 30?!"

Time's up…..

Kiba: "You….. are… really…..buchou's boyfriend! 30 is correct!"

["Well done partner. Now if you'd excuse me, I'm taking a nap. Zzz.."]

Issei: "Thanks Ddraig…"

Rias: "Hmph! I sholdn't have shared a closet with Ise…"

Akeno: "Ufufu! So that's how he got it."

Kiba: "Ok, so the score now is 4 to none. Same as just now, 30 seconds to answer as many as you can. You need at least 4 correct answers to proceed and your time starts…. Now! What's Ise-kun favorite food?"

Rias: "Unagi bento!"

Kiba: "Correct! Who gave Ise-kun his 1st kiss?"

Akeno: "Rias!"

Rias: "No!"

Kiba: "No, Irina-kun."

Now Irina is blushing.

Kiba: "Ise-kun claims his favorite board game is…"

Rias: "Risk!"

Kiba: "Correct! But his favorite game is…"

Akeno: "Ooh! Monopoly !"

Kiba: "Excellent! What are Ise-kun's parent's names?"

…..

Rias and Akeno are dumbfounded.

Rias: "Oooh! What are their names! WHAT ARE THEIR NAMES!"

Akeno: "Ooh Oh! MR & MRS HYOUDOU!"

Everyone stared at Akeno stupidly…

Rias: "THAT'S NOT EVEN A NAME!"

Rias & Akeno: "Oh come on think think think! "

TIMES UP!

Rias: "OH!"

Akeno: "MY!"

Rias & Akeno: "GOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDD! NOOOOOO!"

Issei: "Yeeeeeaaaaaaaassssssss!" (does a victory pose)

Kiba: "Well, C-congrats Ise-kun."

Issei: "HAhahhaa! Hey Ddraig! We did it!"

["Huh? What? Did I miss anything?"]

Xenovia: "Congrats Ise!"

Irina: "Nice work Ise-kun! I knew you'll receive the Lord's blessing."

(Oww!) Issei got a headache.

Koneko: "Hahahahahah" (still rolling on the floor laughing)

Asia: "To be expected from Ise-san, Rias-oneesama & Akeno-san, you two did very well too."

Issei now receiving a death glare from the crimson-haired devil while Akeno started generating lightning in the hands.

Issei: "Wait! Akeno-san! I thought you didn't mind cosplaying!"

Akeno: "Ara ara, yes I don't mind ufufu. But you just gave me a reason to shock you ufufu!"

["Well, she is a sadist after all…."]

Kiba: "Now hold on buchou, Akeno-san. You both agreed to Ise-kun to enter the event so the promise is yours to keep."

Rias: "% &#% ! Sigh... Alright...But that doesn't mean you can take advantage of the forfeit Ise ! So where is that costume?"

Issei: "Right here!"

Issei took out 2 revealing magical girl costumes complete with wands and hats. Red for Rias, and violet for Akeno.

(The next day at Kuoh Community hall)

Rias: "I want to die so baaaaddd! So embarrassing!"

Akeno: "Oh come on Rias, it's not that bad."

Photographer 1: "Smile please!"

Akeno seems to enjoy herself, unlike Rias.

Rias: "Sigh…. Well, as long as my servants and family are not her….."

(FLASH)

Issei: "Hi Rias! I thought I brought some company with me!"

Rias: "Ise… and….. SONA!? _ !"

Sona: "Ufufu.. Hey Rias! I've never been to a Comic fiesta before so….

Rias: "Pleaaaassseee tell me that's all you bring Ise…"

Sirzechs: "Look Millicas! A your aunt Rias is a magical girl."

Rias: "Oni-sama!"

Issei: "Ok him, I didn't bring…"

Crimson aura rising to dangerous levels!

Rias: "MOU! ISSSEEEEE ! THIS TIME FOR SURE! I WON'T FORGIVE YOU!"

Issei: "Kyaaaa! Akeno-san ! Sona-kaichou! Anybody! Save me!"

Akeno: "Ara ara Ufufu! Ise-kun should know his limits next time, Ufufu!"

 **And so our favourite Sekiryutei is being shot by random balls of destruction by everyone's beloved red-head all across the hall and….**

 **Issei: "Hey author! Save me!"**

 **Me: All right Issei, you're free to go.**

 **Rias: (panting) "Grrrr…! Author! You're next!"**

 **Me: Wha… wait Rias! I can explainnn!**

 **OK guys, gotta run! Until next time!**

 **Rias: "Wait! Come back here! I'M NOT DONE WITH YOU YEEEETTTT!"**


End file.
